Serial Post , Finale : 1 Maybe 2 Steps Closer to you …. (Another me, yasu, and Mr. Friday)

you in here is random as random as the destination of yasu’s gonna blow my mind to


but as you all know the random things in my life is very limited, so yes you can guess who is the you in this post. Of course one of them should be him …

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noi      :   is there any possibility you can make it not random …
yasu   :   so you can choose …?
noi      :   aha yeah ….
yasu   :   then the answer is no …

and the next one is Mr. Friday, my dreams, happiness and the last one is My Almighty God. I’ll talk about this topic later, because i have to close the Serial Post first ne. Actually i don’t wanna close this, so that’s the reason why i do this finale part late, so late long time after The Final Performance on Budokan.

But still we have to close things that we’ve already open ne to make everything in balance. This world, for me is about balancing, like yin and yang, positive and negative, good and bad, reward and punishment so does open and close. Well there you are my last Serial Post :

Acid Black Cherry TOUR『2012』  07月20日   –  Nippon Budokan, Day 2 ….

1. Photos of the venue  :

plus this cake

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2. What he (read : yasu) was doing during this tour or behind the stage.

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3.  A final check by yasu himself plus sleeping or whatever he did on the audience seat and he showed the seat number

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4. Acid Black Cherry TOUR “2012” HAIR CATALOGUE #22

there you are the final Acid Black Cherry TOUR “2012” HAIR CATALOGUE and yasu can take a rest for being the model. i am not gonna say anything about this but only this : he is kinda feel glad or should i say relieved about how this is gonna be his last time as hair catalogue model ….

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yasu     :   what, relieved? …. i don’t say that …
noi       :   but …
yasu    :   ah i know you say that because you can’t say anything right?
noi       :   eehhh you know …

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so finally yes, this serial post is over, just like  Acid Black Cherry TOUR『2012』, and now we better get ready for the next tour

but before that 5th Anniversary Live, yasu still have another performances like the next a-nation, and yeah of course VAMPS Hallloween Party on October . yeah he is still busy ne, and who knows if among all his schedule and the ongoing live performances he has something for us ne,

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noi       :   oke ya_san,
yasu    :   nani …
noi       :   give me something i have no problem with spoiler ..
yasu    :   sorry but i am not gonna give a spoiler to a spoil girl like you …
noi       :   but maybe …

maybe a new single will be announced before, on or after 5th Anniversary Live? like last year when PISTOL single announced during the Sixth Sense Live …? …ohohohoho …. *lost in her own imagination*

and this another Acid Black Cherry TOUR『2012』 live report, and this one  is the complete one (read : much more photos than the other ) … xD

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that one above is my fave …

come on, look at him ne that’s something mind blowing of yasu is his smile ne what else and this one below is just fit to be the new banner on Acid Black Cherry Group on Facebook ..

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me gusta, perfecto ….!!!!

and finally there you are my own 『mini y』 and one lovely omiyage from marchlavender  #whoaaaa

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so cute ne, so i only have 2 of this  『the mini y』 series that one and the upcoming is the one with white shirt and black tie. and i hope the Offical Online Shop is gonna open another pre-order for that because it sold out fast and i see the price on Yahoo Auctions just scared me, geez it became double and maybe more than that …

i also received the Acid Black Cherry 『2012』  band_score last week, but I never imagine if the band_score is gonna be that big ne, i mean i thought it gonna be small like a pocket book or something but it is big ne …

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when i open it after the page with yasu, i understand nothing about it. it’ all about musical notes, yeah it is a band_score ne not a pamphlet or photobook so no wonder what i found is lots of musical notes, that sure my simple brain never understand. my musical teacher and my seniors at University Choir that i joined  said how musical note_blinded i am oftenly and yes they are right.

but at least i have this to complete my bucket of  Acid Black Cherry 『2012』  and not only that who knows if one day my unborn child will have some musical taste and know how to read that band_score? … so it is still yay i got it  …!!

now let’s back to the random you  that i wanna be close to topics :

~   1. who else but yasu …?

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today i call some agency to ask whether they can help me to get a visa to Japan. I know i should take care of this by myself but i can’t do that. I mean leave my whole bunch of papers and problems at my desk that wait for me to fix and edit just to go to Japan Embassy in Jakarta to handle it?

no i can’t do that, i mean yeah oke if you think i am lazy to do this by myself that’s right but i think if i handle force my self to go to Jakarta to get my visa it will cost the same like if i use some agency service ne. I live in a very small city and yes it is so far far away from Jakarta, it need about a whole night travel by bus and one hour by plane.

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yasu    :    then take the one hour plane …
noi       :    no no no ya_san …
yasu    :    why …?
noi       :    i told you ne,
leaving on a jet plane is not my division …
yasu    :    but if you go to Japan you have to in to leaving on a jet plane division
noi       :    i’ll think about that later ..
yasu    :    then what division you are in …?
noi       :    many, but not plane related

i just have enough with all dizziness and ear problems (read : can’t hear anything for a week) again, no more. and also the cost like plane ticket, taxi to the Japan Embassy from Airport (of course i am not gonna go by bus, i don’t wanna get lost in Jakarta) is gonna be the same as if i use agency to get it for me, like that simple ne …

ah ya i call the agency that adrio_nevralka told me, using her reference because this agency is the one that her office use to call to handle something like this. But then the agency said they only accept for Jakarta only. while i am in Central Java. this mean i have to find another agency at least based on Central Java who accept people who live in Central Java ne. I should’ve know this ne …

and not only that, i also read if there’s another terms on this visa application to Japan. they said they want a schedule of my visit there. eeeeh like a tour or something? nah this is what’s on my mind ne. I mean how do i supposed to do that, i have no idea …

plans …? sure i have many plans in my mind, but that’s only in my mind and it really hard for me to get it out of my mind and write it down to A4 paper as my tour schedule. What should i write …

~  watch live concert ..
~  go to Osaka Castle …
~  eat tako and okonomiyaki in front of Osaka Castle like the movies …
~  Shibuya
~  Tokyo Disneyland ..
~  sauna maybe … xD
~  eat ramen, sushi, McD Japan and all the Japanese food that i watch on telly  …

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yasu    :    so you go to Japan just to eat …?
noi       :    but i want to see you, that’s the main things …
yasu    :    go away noi_chan, you don’t have plan at all ….
noi       :    then what …

what else, think about what …? yes,  i don’t have a plan at all, so here i am stuck in here think about what should i write as my one week tour schedule on my visa application. but i have to think harder about it ne because if i can handle this and i can get a visa to go to Japan well that means i am gonna be  …

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noi       :    1 Maybe 2 Steps Closer to you, ya_san …
yasu    :     then start think …!!
noi      :     i do think about you ne …
yasu    :    not me, but your plans and noi_chan, just stay focus OK …

2. closer to, eh no i mean a little step away from Mr. Friday …

it has to be end, this weird or obsessed feeling that i have to him (read : Mr. Friday, not yasu). i mean this Ramadhan is a perfect timing for me to start a a little step away from Mr. Friday .. and

~  3. one step closer to my Almighty God …

i started it well by not think about him on my pray at mosque these days. i just go there and sit outside the mosque because i was late and everyone already had their own spot but me. but Mr. Friday’s mother (his family own the mosque ne) prepare carpets for anybody who didn’t get a spot in the mosque like me …. xD

i remember when i was a little and my feeling about him was still madly in love not crazy but stupidly stable loving him (read : Mr. Fiday, not yasu) like now. i am  sure i will be inside the mosque at the front line, right behind the man’s shaft (the line in praying) for what …? none other than to watch his (read : Mr. Friday, not yasu) back .

and watch him doing all the move on praying from behind, Oh Dear God please have a mercy on me … it was beautiful ne, and i enjoyed it. see this is why we are not M.F.E.O (Made For Each Other) because my one step closer to my Mr. Friday means my one step away to my Almighty God .

because what i did that time it was totally wrong, i supposed to be there for pray to my God, but what did i do? nothing but watched that beautiful back and him praying. I’ll be burn in hell for this, but God is already gave me a really hard punishment for me and i have to take it ne.  so now what i have to do is reverse it to one step closer to my Almighty Godand one step away to my Mr. Friday maybe that’s gonna lead me to …

~  4. one step closer to my happiness …

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that’s Tsukiko_chan, and if you watch this dorama Toshi Densetsu no Onna i am sure you agree with me how cute is Masami_san there. When i watch that dorama at the first time, it kinda hard for me to believe if she is the same girl on Proposal Daisakusen with Yamapi .

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but she is Masami and she is so different ne, more cute and fresh as a police woman in Tokyo PD who is so addicted to urban legend and then she connect everything to urban legend include the case she work on. She also believe in it. all this urban legend like

~  if you can catch 3 sakura inside your hand in one catch, then your love will stay forever …

nah because there’s no sakura here in my country so i am not gonna do that, yes, skip this ….

if you loose some of your eyelashes, put it on your finger, make a wish and then blow it, then your dreams will become true.

i do this every time i loose my eyelashes and i also blow it, but here in my country there’s also another urban myth that said if you loose some of your eyelashes that means somebody is missing you or at least somebody out there thinking about you ne. …

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noi      :    do you …?
yasu   :    what, me thinking about you ..
noi      :    maybe …
yasu   :   do i look like i don’t have anything to do? …
noi      :    of course you have many things to do …
yasu   :   then dream on, fangirl ..
.

~   if you make a heart symbol on your nail using red color and wait your nail to grows until you can cut that whole heart symbol perfectly, then the man who you love most is gonna love you back …

i am sure i can’t stand not to bite my nail and sure i won’t get the whole heart symbol perfectly … #skip this

~   if you write the name of somebody that you love so much in a new eraser and you are using it, only you until last then  he will know what you feel to him.

i’ll do this tomorrow, i’ll buy a new eraser and write someone’s name on it and sure i will use it even i never draw or write with a pencil but ah ya i’ll find out something to erase …. #whohoho … *very optimis*

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yasu     :   you will write my name …
noi        :   i am sorry but no …
yasu     :   why …
noi        :   because there’s always a wide deep blue sea between us ne and …
yasu     :   you can’t swimm …
noi        :   that’s why it won’t work for you and me ..
.

~   when you look at yourself on double side mirrors infront of you and your back at midnight, then you will see the devil ..

and many urban legends more, but eventually all the case that she worked connected with urban legends, whether is it true or some people use the urban legend to as their alibi, plan, or justify in with. still this dorama is nice to watch.

that mirror things i also i did this, even i only use one mirror instead two. but i still see the same thing, the pathetic, unhappy and the devil side of me and then lots of questions following ….

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like why can’t i be happy while everybody can be happy, why can’t i have a normal live like others, … etc etc you know exactly like one song in Acid Black Cherry 『2012』  :…

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In The Mirror
Lyrics & Music: 林保徳

なぜ俺だけこんな目に会う? 教えてくれよ
いつも不幸せを感じる度 心が荒み出し
挙げ句他人の不幸を望み それを覗き
少し救われたような気になっては
虚しく泣病む

慰めの言葉なんか要らないから
お前も同じ目にあえばいい

わかってるんだ でも できないんだ
鏡の中の俺が言う
「わかるか?この浅ましい男がお前」
思わず目を背けてしまった その哀れな姿に
このまま自分を嫌いになりたくないよ

なぜ俺だけこんな目に会う? 教えてくれよ
何一つ上手くいかない毎日が 俺を黒く染め
挙げ句他人の優しさが 鼻について
差し出された手さえ払いのけて また堕ちていく

憐れみの言葉をかけるくらいなら
バカな奴だと笑ってくれ

わかってるんだ でも できないんだ
鏡の中の俺が言う
「構わない このまま世界よもう終われ」
投げ出してしまいたい俺と 諦めたくない俺
「死んだように生きていくなんて出来ないよ」

わかってるんだ でも できないんだ
鏡の中の俺が言う
「逃げるな 答えを求めたのは誰?」
答えなどもう要らないから イラ立ちを消してくれ
このまま自分を嫌いになりたくないよ

Romanji

Naze ore dake konna me ni au? Oshiete kure yo
Itsumo fushiawase wo kanjiru tabi kokoro ga susamidashi
Ageku hito no fushiawase wo nozomi sore wo nozoki
Sukoshi sukuwareta you na ki ni natte wa
Munashiku nayamu

Nagusame no kotoba nanka iranai kara
Omae mo onaji me ni aeba ii

Wakatterun da demo dekinain da
Kagami no naka no ore ga iu
“Wakaru ka? Kono asamashii yatsu ga omae”
Omowazu me wo somuketeshimatta sono aware na sugata ni
Sonomama jibun wo kirai ni naritaku nai yo

Naze ore dake konna me ni au? Oshiete kure yo
Nani hitotsu umaku ikanai mainichi ga ore wo kuroku some
Ageku hito no yasashisa ga hana ni tsuite
Sashidasareta te sae harainokete mata ochite iku

Awaremi no kotoba wo kakeru kurai nara
[BAKA] na yatsu da to waratte kure

Wakatterun da demo dekinain da
Kagami no naka no ore ga iu
“Kamawanai kono mama sekai yo mou oware”
Nagedashite shimaitai ore to akirametaku nai ore
“Shinda you ni ikiteiku nante dekinai yo”

Wakatterun da demo dekinain da
Kagami no naka no ore ga iu
“Nigeru na kotae wo motometa no wa dare?”
Kotae nado mou iranaikara [IRA]tachi wo keshite kure
Kono mama jibun wo kirai ni naritaku nai yo

English Translation

Why am I the only one who suffers like this? Tell me already
Whenever I feel my unhappiness, it reveals the flaws in my heart
In the end, I wish for the misfortune of others and become a voyeur
When I realize they may have saved me a little
I am troubled, feeling the pain of my illness in my empty tears

Since I have no need for consoling words
It’s fine with me if you suffer the same as I

I really know, but I really can’t
The me in the mirror says
“Don’t you get it? That wretched guy is you”
Without thinking, I averted my eyes from the pitiable figure before me
I don’t want to hate myself like this anymore

Why am I the only one who suffers like this? Tell me already
As I paint the days where something always goes wrong in black
In the end, the kindness of others just disgusts me
As long as I refuse the hand offered to me, I fall all over again

If I just do enough to accept your words of pity and nothing more
Give me your ridicule and make me the fool

I really know, but I really can’t
The me in the mirror says
“I don’t care, hurry up and end, this world that goes on the same”
The me who wants to abandon everything, and the me who doesn’t want to give up
“I can’t go on living as if I’m already dead”

I really know, but I really can’t
The me in the mirror says
“Don’t run away from me, who was the one who went looking for answers anyway?”
Since I don’t need answers anymore, take away my ire
I don’t want to hate myself like this anymore

yasu wrote that song perfectly ne, so perfect until it slapped me over and over every time i lookin to my self in the mirror, it is not that i hate myself not that far but i kinda feel sorry for my self for how unhappy i am, and the same sorry for all the people next to me who affected by my un_happiness

sure i do have things in my mind of  wish for the misfortune of others because after all i am only an ordinary people and still have this devil side of me that i let to win many times.

lady mary and matthew

I can’t be so kind like Lady Mary who can be so happy for the love of her life cousin Matthew happiness for finding Miss Lavinia Swire and their nice romantic love and upcoming wedding while she 100% still in love with him. If i were her i am not gonna spent my time visiting Lavinia when she got sad because Matthew is gonna be at war and how she say yes when Matthew ask her to take care of his mother and her fiance while he is away …

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yasu      :    that’s not good noi_chan …
noi         :    his mother yes, but his fiance? no, big NO for that …
yasu      :    there you are still the same selfish you ..
noi         :    yes, then what should i do ne …

the point is i am not happy and i have to take this the un_happy me instead of hate it, and try to do something to make me better so the happiness can find me like what kmakms said today on her comments about how  you don’t look for happiness , but it looks for you

waw Nikki, that’s brilliant and sure what she said change my mind and give me another hope. with another things to do to make me better. maybe all this time happiness kinda hard to find me because how hard me to find. I hope this Ramadhan can make me better, see wash your hair, take a bath, scrubbing and all things you do in the bathroom can make your body clear, but for your soul you need to do something more.

nah for me what i do is fasting in this Ramadhan and one step closer to my Almighty Godand one step away to my Mr. Friday will clean my soul and there will be no trouble for happiness to find me like how happiness found Nikki …

so hey you, happiness and you ya_san find me hurry ne …!!!!

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yasu      :    why should i …
noi         :    because i am waiting ….
yasu      :    just that …
noi         :    and i am your fangirl …
yasu      :    yes you are but number 40,001 …
noi         :    then …
yasu      :    then you have to wait ne, i have a long line of 40,000 fans wait for me …
noi         :    ah ya for the Handshake event …

today Acid Black Cherry Official announced the winners for the Handshake Event for 40,000 fans in here : http://acidblackcherry.net/qa.html and Kiku got it, she is gonna meet and have a handshake with yasu ….

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this is weird ne and i dunno why. i mean Kiku is the one who is gonna meet and have handshake with yasu but i just so excited about it. Well maybe this is because i think she really deserved it after all what she’s already did with her amazing LJ and i knew from all those 40,000 lucky fans who won that, she is one of them … #yay … and i can’t wait for her report after the Handshake event

this is so weird ne how something simple like this can make me happy like this even i am not the one who get it because i didn’t apply, the fact is i have no idea how to apply.  well eventually my heart still draws a dream and now …

I love myself and tryin to be happy now ….!!!

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yasu     :    so everything in our garden is rosy again noi_chan …?
noi        :    yes, sure …
yasu     :    then i’ll check that …
noi        :    eeeh … no no ya_san, you don’t have to .. OMG … *run to the garden*
yasu     :    i knew it is gonna be that way …

~owari~

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